What If They Have Been In Your House for Months and You Haven't Even Known Till Last Night.....When You Heard a Noise .. Then Banging... Growling
Now - Tonight The Kids are Crying and Your Wife is Screaming at You...
Your Wife URGING you to " Go Up There and Check...
"NO WAY MAN... I've SEEN ALL Those Movies I'M NOT GETTING MY BRAINS ATE!!!"
Your Wife Reassures You "Hun you're scaring the kids.."
You say while Talking in a Little Boy I Don't WANNA Voice, Looking Down at the Floor as You Kick Your Feet "It's Dark Up There... Don't Wanna Right Now... OK...Can't We at Least Wait till Morning I'll Take Us To a Hotel...Hey Kids Who want to go to the Comfort Inn...YAY!!!"
THE KIDS CHEERED, but YOUR WIFE Hands You a Flashlight and Baseball Bat and Shoves You Toward The Ladder Of The Attic Hatch.
"Darling GET YOUR ASS UP THERE AND check IT OUT NOW.. Dear!!!"
Your Wife Turns to The Kids "It's OK Kids Daddy's Going Up In The Attic RIGHT NOW and get rid of those Scary Monsters - AREN'T YOU DADDY?"
she leans in - whispers "BE A MAN A GET UP THERE!@"
Now With your little Boy I didn't get my own way stomp you turn toward the ladder "FINE THEN I'LL GO, AS LEAST I'LL HAVE THE PLEASURE OF KNOWING THAT IF I DO HAVE MY BRAINS EATEN BY THE LIVING DEAD THAT ARE UP THERE WANTING TOO POUNCE. THAT AFTER THEY EAT MY BRAINS I'M COMING DOWN TO EAT YOURS!!!" Then you Look Back giving her a - So There - GO TO HELL VIXEN Look.
The Kids Jumping Up and Down, Clapping and Cheering You on
" Go Get The Dead guys Daddy!!!"
He Turns to Climb up the Ladder Looking Down at the Rungs Trying to Figure Out How to Get Up With Your Hands Full.
You Put One Foot on a Rung
Flashlight in One Hand with Elbow on on Rail and Baseball Bat In The Other.
You Make Your Way Up the Ladder.
Concentrating so hard on not falling that you forgot what you were going up there for...
- The Growling Has Gotten Louder SOUNDING LIKE A RABID SNARLING WILD BEAST
-BUT Your Not Paying Attention And Haven't Realised That There's Movement At The Attic Hatch Right - Above - Your - Head!!!
You on Your Elbows Holding Your flashlight and Baseball Bat (tongue sticking out cause you're trying so hard) all proud of your self that you made it up the ladder. "LOOK I MADE IT" YOU GRINNED. "WHAT THE?"
FINALLY - YOU'VE - LOOKED - UP ONLY TO BE STARRING IN TO SCARY RED ORANGE GLOWING EYES - Coming out from the Pitch Black Attic - GROWLING DIRECTLY AT YOU!!!!!!
IT STRIKES A CLAW THROUGH THE FLESH OF YOUR CHEEK!
THE RACCOON GRABS THE FLASHLIGHT
Screw the Flashlight........
You're Scrambling like Fred Flintstone not to Fall. You Grab for the Ladder - The Claws Come Out of the Dark again YOU SMACK THEM AWAY WITH THE BAT!!
"It's a Raccoon HOLY SHIT IT'S A RACCOON!"
The Raccoon Grabs the Bat Out of Your Hands!
"HOLY SHIT THE RACCOON JUST GRABBED THE THE BAT!!! HE TOOK MY BAT!!!"
"F&** THIS!!!" YOU JUMP OF THE LADDER fold it up and SLAMMED THE HATCH SHUT!!!
"OK WE NEED TO CALL SOMEONE... MAYBE A PRIEST - That Thing is Possessed and Now It's armed and I Think It Has Reinforcements"
FIND OUT TOMORROW WHAT HAPPENED TO THE DEMON RACCOONS LIVING IN THE ATTIC!
Are You Having Problems With Raccoons Or Other Animal In or Around Your Home or Business in Ontario, Canada?
What City Do You Live In? DOES IT FEEL LIKE SQUIRRELS ARE MAKING A REALITY TV SHOW IN YOUR ATTIC?
Almonte, Alvinston, Arnprior, Ancaster, Angus,
Arthur, Atwood, Aurora, Aylmer, Ayr, Baden,
Bancroft, Barrie, Bathurst, Beamsville, Belleville, Blenheim, Blyth, Bolton, Bowmanville, Bracebridge,Brampton, Brantford, Bridgeport, Breslau, Bloomingdale, Brights Grove, Brockville, Burford, Burk’s Falls, Burlington, Caledon, Caledonia, Cambridge,Campbellville, Canning, Cayuga, Chatham, Chesley, Clifford, Clinton, Cobourg, Cochrane, Colborne, Conestogo, Cookstown, Cornwall, Courtland, Craigleith, Crystal Beach, Delhi, Dorchester, Drayton, Dundalk, Dundas, Dunnville, Durham, Dutton, Eganville, Elliot Lake, Elmira, Elmvale, Elora, Embro, Erin, Essex, Exeter, Fenelon Falls, Fergus, Fonthill, Galt, Georgetown, Glencoe, Grafton, Grand Bend, Grand Valley, Gravenhurst, Grimsby, Guelph, Hamilton, Hanover, Harriston, Harrow, Harrowsmith, Hastings, Havelock, Hawkesbury, Hearst, Hensall, Hillsburgh, Huntsville, Ingersoll, Ingleside, Keswick, King, Kingsville, Kirkland Lake, Kitchener, Lakeshore – Toronto, Lambeth, Lancaster, Lansdowne, Leamington, Lindsey, Listowel, London, Lucan, Lucknow, Madoc – Brampton, Malton, Markdale, Markham, Maryhill, Massey, Meaford, Merlin, Merrickville, Metcalfe, Midland, Mildmay, Milton, Milverton, Minden, Mississippi Mills, Mississauga, Mitchell, Morrisburg, Mount Forest, Mount Pleasant, New Dundee, New Hamburg, Niagara Falls, Niagara on the Lake, Nobleton, Norwick, Norwood, Oakville, Odessa, Orangeville, Orillia, Osgoode, Paisley, Palmerston, Paris, Parkhill, Port Credit, Prescott, Preston, Renfrew, Richmond, Richmond Hill, Rockwood, Rodney, Shakespeare, Shelburne, Simcoe, Smithville, Southampton, St.Catharines, St. Clements, St. Jacobs, St. Mary’s, Stayner, Stirling, Stoney Creek, Stirling, Stratford, Strathroy, Streetsville, Sturgeon Falls, Tavistock, Thornbury, Thornhill, Thorold, Tilbury, Tillsonburg, Toronto, Trenton, Tweed, Upsala, Uxbridge, Vankleek Hill, Vaughan, Verner, Walkerton, Wallaceburg, Wasaga Beach, Waterdown, Waterloo, Watford, Welland, Wellesley, Wellington,Whitby,Whitechurch Stouffville